This is a deceptive title, since it was me finding a man for my best friend.
And, yes, it “took.” How in the world this happens when I am able to find
a complete stranger and get two people together, a year later marry, two
years later, they build a house and next year, 2013,it will be twenty years
happily ever after!
So, to start with, I was engaged so I was not looking for myself. Just my best
friend. I would find a man very nicely chatting in the grocery line, find out he
was taken. I would find a man in line at the cleaners’ and he would be gay.
I found a man choosing a bottle of wine at World Market and we had the
best conversation, I mention I am trying to find a man for a friend, a fellow
teacher, a sweet petite blonde woman. He is looking for a runner and biker
woman. I ask, “Do you like tandems, mountain bikes or ?” It turns out he
meant a motorcycle mama. He literally likes bigger women who rides Harleys.
Not my best friend’s type either.
I am at a video store, it is 1993, and I am finally engaged, mother of three
children. (My husband to be, who was the unlucky thirteen years of control
freak man.) This man in line is dark haired, “cute”, and is talking to an
older woman, he calls her “Rose.” He says (the gist of conversation) that he
has been looking for a woman to love, love his two kids, who would not be a
bar person, who is friendly and outgoing. He says to Rose that he enjoyed the
last camping trip with his son and her son. She says her husband, Joe, also
I look closely at him, memorize his face and then after studying the back of her
head, she turns and I recognize her. This is how it goes, I call my best friend at
the time, Lori, and say, “Do you remember when we went to see Sha Na Na at
the Delaware County fair a couple years back?” She answers, “Yeah, sure, we went
with about five other women.” I ask, “Do you remember a woman named Rose?”
She answers, “Yeah, she was with Mary Jo,” and gives me her phone number.
Before I hang up, I tell her I met my other friend, Jenny’s future husband.
Lori (who is just like me, a single mom with 3 kids, and engaged to be married)
says, “Oh, that is so exciting! Let me know how it works out!”
I call Mary Jo and tell her the whole story and she is so excited. Her son is in
Boy Scouts with this man’s son and she says, “Dave is soo nice!” I am very
encouraged by my assessment (o.k. so I am much better match-making than
running my own life!) She proceeds to give me Rose’s phone number and
although it is now ten o’clock at night, she says to please call her if I get Dave’s
phone number. She also wished she had it so I could get right to the talking to
the man part for my friend, Jenny.
I get Rose on the phone and she is so happy. “Yes, that was me in the video store,
yes, that man is a very nice man.” Although she is very excited about the future
arrangements, she is a little hesitant to give out his phone number. I repeat, “Do
you remember when we went to the Sha Na Na concert awhile back and I was with
Lori? You can verify that I am friends with Lori and by proximity and the way women
bond during an oldies concert, we are all friends.” She gives me Dave’s phone number
and I go to bed happy.
The next evening I give this man a phone call and I ask if I could give her his phone
number. He says, “I would like to call her and it is worth a shot to meet the right
person.” I quickly call Jenny and keep her line busy for a half hour, first telling her
about Dave and Rose in the video store. Then, trying to give her a pep talk. You have
to know we were on a singles video site for about a year when I met my last husband
at church. So much for the wasted $600! She said, “Oh, it is worth a shot!”
This part is a little unbelievable but you have to trust me, I cannot make up this stuff!
On my Wedding Day, 1993, I am wearing my dress and taking out my rollers and my
friend, Jenny is on the phone. My Mom and Dad are watching my three kids and my
fiance’s three kids (yeah, the Brady Bunch!) and I take off out the door, saying I will
be back in a minute. I am walking to the Delaware Arts Festival and going to point
out to my friend who is the man she has been talking to on the phone off and on
for a month! “There is Dave, he is in the Lion’s Club booth serving sandwiches, fries,
or drinks.” She takes a look at him, I hold my breath, she turns to me and says,
“Thank you, Robin!” One year after I marry, she marries almost to the day! She is
the stepmom for a boy and a girl. They are still together. I am not with my last
husband but that is not a happy story so concentrate on the miracle of listening
in and how butting into people’s lives becomes one!