A Sentimental Scottish Tale


The Bagpiper

(in his own words, anonymously written)

As a bagpiper, I play many gigs. Recently, I was asked by a funeral

director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man. He had

no family nor friends, so the service was to be at a paupers’ cemetery.

This was in the hills and back country.

As I was not familiar with the backwoods, I got lost and being typical

man, didn’t stop for directions.

I finally arrived, an hour late and saw the funeral guy had evidently

gone. The hearse was nowhere in sight. There were only diggers and

a crew left. They were sitting under a tree eating lunch.

I felt badly and apologized for being late. I went to the side of the

grave and looked down. The vault lid was in place. I didn’t know what

else to do, so I started to play.

The workers put down their lunches and began to gather around.

I played my heart out. I gave it my best performance filled with my soul.

I’ve never played before for a homeless person, but my imagination gave

me a picture of this lost person, lonely and afraid.

As I played, “Amazing Grace,” for my final song, the workers shed a few

tears. We tend to be an emotional country, here in Scotland. Funerals are

serious business.

We were all weeping together.

When I finished, I packed up my bagpipes and started for the car.

Though my head hung down low, my heart was filled with joy.

As I opened the car door to my car, I overheard one of the older workers, who

may have been a little deaf. He was not whispering, but using a rather loud

voice. . .

“I’ve never seen nothing like that before and I’ve been putting septic tanks in

for twenty years.”



About reocochran

I am experiencing crazy and hapless adventures in dating that may interest people over fifty. I am now approaching 62 later this year and enjoy taking photographs, incorporating stories or poetry on my blog. I have many old posts which are informative and written like essays. I have several love stories collected from family and friends. Even strangers spill their stories, since I am a grown version of the girl next door. I have been trying to live a healthy lifestyle with better food selections and active hiking and walking. I have written four children's books and illustrated them. They are not published but a battered women's shelter used one about neglect and abuse for their children's program and a 4H group used my "Kissing a Bunny is like saying a Prayer" as a coloring book. Please comment or respond so I may get a chance to know you. Sincerely, Robin

28 responses »

    • I had to give it a few ‘tweaks’ but this was on the internet, sent to my Mom, by her friend, “Pooky.” She copies them in color, even, sending her big manila envelopes of them! this is my ‘resource’ for my funny stuff. Glad I could ‘pull your leg,’ and you would chuckle at it!

    • I like it on an organ or piano, but not sure if I have heard it on the bagpipes. I have heard funeral ‘dirges’ on the bagpipes, Chris and they get me teary-eyed. I also cry with the trumpets that play, “Taps.” Glad to get smiles for this one!

    • Oh, so proud and glad to have this reblogged. I must tell you that my Mom gets letters, emails and other jokes hard copied and put into a big manila envelope almost every other month from a good friend in California. Her name is Joyce, she has the nickname of “Pooky.” I have used her Maxine comics, which you may copy from the internet like she does with the photos in color, too! I had to change and elaborate this one, but it was mainly as is, by anonymous bagpiper (joker)! Thanks, Cathy!

      • Aww, that is so nice of “Pooky” to do that for your mom!!
        I couldn’t resist reblogging, it was so hilarious and had me going good!!!
        In light of all the bad news around us, it was a welcome relief!!!
        So it was my pleasure Robin!!! 😀


      • I hope when we are 85 like my Mom is, we will have someone ‘looking after us,’ in terms of humorous things to read! Cathy, after reading some of your posts, I am so happy that I was able to get you to laugh! You deserve more sunshine and less pain in your life, my dear!

    • So happy to have you find this hilarious! I like to weed through my Mom’s envelope of ‘goodies’ which she tells people in her senior living apartments, “My daughter is a blogger and I provide her articles and jokes for her blog!” She is precious, if you have not run into stories about her, you will! Smiles, Robin

      • So nice you still have your mom Robin!!! They are characters as they get older and I look forward to reading stories about her!!
        Unfortunately I lost my mom 5 years ago, feels like yesterday, and I miss her terribly. She definitely provided a lot of comic relief along the way!!! Now my dad is 81 and he keeps us laughing and on our toes!!!!


      • I am sure I will be devastated when my Mom dies. I am so sorry about the loss of your mother. It seems we all must face this, so glad I have mine still. I will hold her more tightly, kiss her more frequently and tell her all the things we sometimes hold back. Plus, listen more intently. . . Thanks, Cathy. Enjoy your weekend, I have to go watch some grandchildren and take them to dinner! Smiles, Robin

    • You’re welcome, Jill! I have laughed a few times, retelling this at work, too! You have to embellish it, adding details and drawing it out, then deliver the punch line! Smiles, Robin

    • So honored to have this story reblogged on your blog, Jonathan! I had to give it a little bit of ‘tweaking’ to make it a story, then waiting to deliver the punchline. My Mom gave me this one, also the little children’s jokes and the nasty barber’s wooden ball joke… I have deleted the jokes and added the ending of the gazebo fire house park story. Take care!

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