Category Archives: “Don’t put all your eggs in one basket”

Juggling Acts

Standard

I have had a few unspoken or unwritten recent dating experiences that

you may be interested in knowing a little bit about! Since Labor Day

weekend, knowing I was coming home to a coffee “date” I asked my

dear Mom what she thought would be a good word of advice. She

told me in no unflinching terms, “Robin, you need to be confident!

Don’t put all your eggs in one basket, this time!”

Not one to turn down any offers of matchmaking or setting myself

up, I met a nice man who was a friend of a friend’s husband. He is

going to be called, “The New Mark.” Since his name is Mark and there

have been posts with the fisherman named Mark, this is a man who

is also, “The New and Improved Mark.” I mean it! He is interesting

because I have never dated a chemist before. He is also more serious,

but I have been telling my guy friends, (Bill and Gary) that I needed

a “Nerd!” or a “Brainiac!”

Seriously, I had such wonderful boyfriends and friends in high school

that were deep and thoughtful. I was very happy, but also, nervous

when I planned to arrive home from Mom’s, dash inside with my

baggage, shower, change and get to the closest coffee shop!

The assignation was chosen for its close proximity and walking

distance from my apartment building. This place has creative

juices flowing in its appearance and the seating with sofas, comfy

chairs in contrast to the utilitarian silver metal tables and chairs

along the wall is a uniquely contrasted locale with a wide variety

of clientele. I enjoyed playing cards one time on the metal table

with a male friend. I also, have tagged along, while my daughter

and also, my brother, with their laptops used the free wi-fi along

with imbiding in their homemade featured treats and drinking a

“cup of joe,” also.  It used to be known as “The Mean Bean” but it

is currently named, “Something Sweet.” It still has Scandanavian

blue glass light fixtures and unusual art displays of local artists.

They can be metal, paintings, chalk or photographs and remain to

decorate the walls for only a month, you may purchase or then,

if not bought, they are gone!

I recognized the man with the striped white button down collared

shirt right away as the new Mark. He appeared very calm and I felt

peaceful in his company. I tend to chatter at a fairly fast pace, have

mentioned that I acquired this habit, first as a young mother, then

through the years as a mother, babysitter, then teacher and now,

grandmother. I have found comfort in my best friends totally and

completely understanding this mode of conversation. I am glad

that once Bill said, pausing to study my face and giving me a

worried look, when I was actually quiet and listening! He asked,

“Are you okay? You seem ‘down’ today!”

I replied, “This is me, when I am being your good friend and

listening!” (We both burst into laughter over that exchange!)

Mark asked me about my Labor Day weekend, I gave him some

of what I summarized with my post back then. I did not know

how this would proceed so I did not put any of this on my post.

I think I have learned my lesson, my Lenny lesson, how excited

I had been for that six weeks period. Even blogging about my

personal thoughts!

Mark told me that he analyzes paint at PPG as a chemist, he

is also “on call” sometimes on weekends, in case of emergencies.

He talked about movies with me, he likes serious ones, also. I

told him about my Mom and how she ended up in the senior

living apartments. Also, about my 6 months on match.com. He

told me that he appreciated Lu and how her husband had come

up with the idea of meeting me. He was complimenting my attire

and I complimented him back. He has hair! He has nice brown

eyes and brown hair. He wears glasses. I confessed that I take my

contacts out after I am finished with my job and my blogging. I

would have to wear bi-focals if I didn’t have a wonderful eye doctor

who suggested soft contacts withmy strong eye wearing the far

sided one, the weaker (lazier) eye wearing the close up/ near

sighted one. I wear a pair of wire rims in my apartment and I have

those transitional glasses for walking in the summertime.

We talked about books, I am not a serious book reader, I like

mysteries, some romances, and historical fiction. I used to read

the Bible more, I have worn the cover off mine and have so many

pages that are written all over the edges.

I shared my politics and my open mindedness. I am sure this is

not a “first date’ regular subject. But he asked the questions and

I was free with my opinions. Best to be “myself” no sense in trying

to hide myself.

Been there, done that!

I told him I would like to be better at “going with the flow.” I have

that goal to be one that would become my “mantra” if possible.

I have been a lifelong worrier, some of you have read why. I won’t

go into it, didn’t then on the “date” that ended up turning into a

nice Monday night dinner at Opa’s where the gyros are made with

a combination of beef and lamb or you can have grilled chicken.

You are given two choices of potatoes, I like the ones that taste

like “fair fries.” I like the garlic sauce and the special cucumber

sauce. We each had iced teas, then switched to coffee. This Greek

restaurant is across the street from my apartment so we could look

out the window and I could tell him he could park there “next time.”

We walked out into a chilly night, the sky was cloudy but I tilted my

head up, I told him about my Dad’s life work. How he is up there

in the Heavens, rearranging stars. My youngest daughter and I

have looked out across Lake Erie where he loved to fish, seen the

shooting stars and were amazed that it happens quite often while

together. She is very close to his memory, she had no father, so

my brothers and her Grandpa Oldrieve are her male role models

and ones she loves the best.

The New and Improved Mark is a good man, he has two teens so

he will be busy every other weekend. We will talk on the phone

but I told him I am not a big “texter.” We have gotten together

one other time, since his busy weekend, I was not and then my

busy weekend, he was not busy! I had my son’s big camp out,

#32 birthday and his wife and his fifth anniversary party. I was

there before the thirty guests arrived but had fun for awhile

seeing the food, the kids running wild, then I took four of six

grandchildren home to my house.

Our last date was on a Sunday and I told him I liked having

Sunday “dinners” with someone special. I appreciated that

we went to Bun’s Restaurant. I told him the history and how

it burned down and the new owner being a different kind

of man than the German roots of old. He talked about his

family history, his ancestors and we had a nice conversation

while I ate a spinach salad with grilled chicken, the West

Winter Street salad. He had a salmon dinner, salad and baked

potato. As we left, I bought two frosted cookies and told him

the reason; it used to have a bakery and the homemade buns

are still here.

When I ate more recently with Gary, we talked about his most

disastrous date that he had in the past five or so months since

we had eaten together. He made it humorous, but it was very

much a disaster. I told him about looking at the 40th high school

reunion as being an impetus to find someone who would know

my past, my thinking period of my life, and maybe find the man

of my dreams. I told Gary I wanted a deep thinker and that I hoped

he would understand that I did not feel he was one. We are just

meant to be friends.

To emphasize my point,  I left him a text message that said:

“I am turning on PBS to watch “Masterpiece Theatre.”

Gary quickly responded back, “I am going home to watch Looney

Tunes cartoons!”

(Maybe I hurt his feelings but he is, after all, a sports editor,

and I have often told him I would attend one game of each type,

during each season, but am not a “die hard sports nut!”)

Meanwhile, I do have the “best of two worlds” due to a long term

friendship with Bill (who dates Heather) and Gary (who is still on

match.com looking for a woman to be his future partner. He has

two children who are in high school that take a lot of his time

and keep him company, too.)

Oh, and by the way, my oldest daughter has a man who looks

like Christopher Walken in mind, if this one “fails!”

My love life is a “Work in Progress!”

I wish for my good male friends, much luck!

And here’s to my new adventure in dating!

Wish me luck (again)!