Some of my friends who are younger are amazed when I mention that up until my
Dad died, my Mom and Dad enjoyed one form of romance or another. Here’s to all
those loving, open and caring people who dance in the kitchen! Hope this inspires
you to put some spice in your life or at least bring your significant other a bouquet
of burgundy, crimson, golden and burnt sienna Autumn flowers. My Mom will be
receiving a pot of those gorgeous lavender-rose chrysanthemums, (the closest there
is in the palette of fall colors to her favorite color of pink!) One important thing I
learned from my Mamma: “Never show up on the doorstep of your friends or loved
ones without an old-fashioned hostess!”
This is especially important if you are showing up with a packed bag, dirty laundry,
and a plan to stay for an extended period of many days! When I would come home
from college, catching a ride from the Studon ‘ride board’ for Fall, Winter or Spring
Break, I already knew which were the certain plants that Mom liked: mums, pink
poinsettias, and pink tulips in that order. The pretty yellow or red daffodils or the
brilliantly gorgeous red poinsettia plants did not ‘fit in’ with the pastels in her formal
Victorian living room.
Kenny Rogers’ song about “bringing his wife flowers” was a big ‘hit’ with Mom. The
memorable special song was called, “Buy Me a Rose,” written by Jim Funk and Erik
Hickenlooper and released in 1999. This song included valuable communication
suggestions like calling one’s partner during the day time, to make her smile and
stay in touch, simple gestures. Too often, those meaningful and thoughtful ways of
staying connected are lost, especially during the frantic paced child-rearing period
of Life. I know, from personal experience oh too well, women can become so wrapped
into their childrens’ lives they miss the signs they are losing touch with their spouses.
My parents set an example of putting priority on their interpersonal relationship
time to go out together, sometimes dressing up to be chaperone school dancees,
then stopping to have a drink out. Low cost; big rewards later.
My Dad knew’if he were in the dog house’ to bring Mom her favorite flowers of all:
pink roses. ”
The song, ” You Don’t Bring Me Flowers” (any more) pulls at my heart strings more
than the song Kenny Rogers sang. It is due to the fact that duets help me transform
to another place and time, creating a picture of the two people facing a crisis. Along
with the two voices of Neil Diamond and Barbra Streisand’s melodic and harmonious
blending made this a ‘perfect’ love song (in my mind.) This song affected many more
people than just me. Interestingly, this song had a very different beginning than I had
remembered. The collaboration of Neil Diamond with the couple, Alan and Marilyn
Bergman, were to write the music for a television comedy called, “All That Glitters.”
It was a very short snippet of a song, originally written as the opening t.v. series’ song
in 1977. (The show never caught on and took a ‘dive.’) Once it became expanded into
a full-length song in 1978, it was played frequently on the radio and became so popular
it won a Grammy Award for “Best Song of the Year.”
Now, for the lighter side of this post, thanks to my Mom sending it to me this week.
(Joke taken from my Mom’s collection from her good friend and California pen pal
Joyce, otherwise known as, “Pooky.”)
“Love Making Tips for Senior Citizens”
1. Wear your glasses.
This will ensure you that your partner actually in the bed and not asleep on a Lazy Boy,
in the living room. Glasses will be helpful for other reasons, like grabbing or tenderly
touching the appropriate body parts.
2. Set a timer for three minutes.
Just in case you accidentally doze off in the middle.
3. Set the mood with lighting.
Suggestion: Turn them ALL off!
Or if #5 is necessary (due to memory loss) keep a low light on your side of the bed
4. Make sure you put “911”on ‘speed dial’ or as one of your emergency contact numbers
on your cell phone. Before you begin. . .
5. Write partner’s name on your hand, in case you can’t remember it.
6. Use extra Poly Grip.
So your teeth don’t end up under the bed.
7. Have Tylenol ready or other medications ready.
Just in case you two actually complete the act. Aches and pains, possible side effects.
8. Make all the noise you want.
The neighbors are probably as old as you are and hard of hearing.
Thank goodness for those endorphins and mood-enhancers.
This can be substituted for your daily regimen of a walk.
Exciting way to get your heart pumping and feel alive.
10. For all those ‘single ladies’ or ‘gentlemen,’
or Dark chocolate can work, too.
It makes me sad there are a lot of couples who barely speak to each other.
When I was a server while in my 40’s I would wait on tables and witness
this pattern of disconnection between lovers. Granted, I worked at Cracker
Barrel, where the busy 36/37 routes intersect with north and south 71. A
lot of my customers were tired, cranky tiravelers who also were hungry.
The way I would do my ‘part’ to brighten their day or night, would be to
get their food or beverage order as soon as I could. Bringing their drinks,
accompanied with a platter of hot biscuits and corn bread helped to break
the ice. Once I established rapport with them, I would fib to them.
I would say they looked like they “belonged together.”
It was such a simple statement
but it helped to improve their mood
and changed the temperature of the
atmosphere between the two of them, too.
Quote for the Day:
“Blessed are those who can give graciously without remembering,
Blessed are those who can take gratefully without forgetting.”
( “The Spire” October,2014 First Presbyterian Church bulletin)