This is going to be filled with mysteries and wonders.
Well, mainly situations that are confusing to me!
I could have just as well named this: “Texts and Subtexts.”
In no particular order, I begin with a man who is about
my age. He has been rather friendly at the library on a few
occasions. He has told me things about his dogs around the
holidays. I may have written about him before.
We have been elbow to elbow, on side by side computers
several times. Each time he has been open and gregarious.
Our conversations usually impart brief details.
His sister lives in California.
There is a unique company that makes ‘dog booties’ to keep
big and small animals’ paws warm in the cold weather.
What did I know about this subject?
I knew that I have seen little dogs, like my Mom’s ‘other’
dog, who lives with my brother and sister in law, (Bella)
wear sweaters but, no, honestly their Golden Retriever and
Newfoundland relish and roll around in snow.
This man is named Roger, introduced himself one late
afternoon, before Saturday’s library closing time. He
“Would you like to grab a quick dinner since I have to
get home in time to walk my dogs?”
He went on to explain he has two large dogs.
I smiled telling him that I had shared, in a past talk,
that my brother and his wife also had two big dogs.
Roger didn’t seem to notice that we had had more than a
conversation or two.
I pondered, I stalled and then, due to a certain weird
inner feeling, I declined and told him,
“Thank you anyway.”
About five minutes later, he chose to rummage through his
back pack, taking things out of it, kind of piling them
close to my ‘space.’ The last thing he pulled out of
this mess was a familiar looking plastic bag with a
famous dog ‘treat’ name on it. He did not seem to be
noticing this, pulling out a long ‘Pupperoni.’ As I was
looking at him, sideways, I pulled in my breath, producing
He looked down and then, of course, he told me he thought
he had grabbed a different kind of snack to nibble on. I
let it go, but he started to tell me he loves ‘Slim Jim’s’
and they look just like this. I nodded my head and kept on
It did seem rather funny, but I kept my sniggering at him,
Early this week I saw Roger and there were no other
computers available, except the one beside him. I sat down
and said a quiet and polite, “Hi.”
I started taking out my story about Mom and our visit over
the weekend. He looked at me closely and said,
“Hey, I asked you out a few weeks’ back, didn’t I?”
I whispered back,
“Yes, how have you been?”
(Hard to break my politeness, even when I was trying to put
He answered that it was finally clearing up and the
weather was getting warmer by Valentine’s Day.
I (seriously) did not respond or ‘bite on that lure.’
This is the puzzling thing, as I was packing up and
putting my notebook, gloves and pen away in my own bag,
I saw a woman approach Roger from the back of his chair.
She placed both hands on his shoulders and asked,
“Are you ready to go, honey?”
Not cool, Roger!
I wonder if I had chosen to go out for that ‘quick bite’
a few weeks’ ago, what kind of story he would have told,
upon arriving home,
full of food?
My dear, old friend, Bill, has been the subject of at least
once a month stories, due to our First Friday’s out and our
having been friends, parents of children who are also
friends and our two oldest daughters are still coworkers.
He has been in a six to eight month relationship with a
younger woman named, Heather. We have spent at least a
half hour or more each month dissecting someone I have
been interested in, past or present, and more than that
about his ‘girlfriend.’ They have taken a ‘break’ from
being physically involved, but they spend every work break
(third shift, so I don’t see them, except as they leave) and
many mornings after Bill drives her children to school.
This is not an unusual circumstance, people remain friends
after they have ‘broken up,’ but this next part is the very
Bill is moving into Heather’s apartment building, which
is actually a large, older home that has been sectioned
off into four or five apartments. She will live on a
different floor in her own apartment, with her children
and she will also be his ‘on site’ apartment manager.
I am wondering how I would survive this new arrangement,
with ANY of the diverse men I have dated and then, ‘moved
Good luck on that, Bill! And I expect to hear more of
the different details of your inexplicable, crazy life!
Melvin was open to answering questions about the Beatles
and his girlfriend, during a recent break at work. He
feels that the Beatles’ influences are too numerous to
even contemplate! His favorite songs from their career
include, “Get Back, Jo Jo!” and “Give Peace a Chance.”
When I asked him, “What are your plans for Valentine’s
He responded that his girlfriend of over fifteen years,
who he lives with, and he were planning to go the base
commissary to pick up some groceries. Also, that they might
eat lunch out, since we expect to be out of our work by
ten thirty or eleven o’clock, tomorrow.
I asked this normally affectionate and warm man, to all
around him, what was Melvin’s special gift he was giving her?
In his rarely used, ‘cocky’ attitude voice, he responded,
“Why, Robin, she will receive the pleasure of my company!”
My response was to roll my eyes at him, head out of the
break room and back to work!
As I was leaving, Melvin almost ran to catch up with me,
asking me if I would like him to buy a bottle of Tart
Cherry juice for my gift from him, at the commissary?
(He says this cures all ills you may have. He has tried
to campaign for me to start using this antidote to the
different aches and pains that I sometimes join in with
others who are complaining.)
Much later, digging himself into a hole, Melvin said that
he wished I would go swimming with his girlfriend and
himself at the local YMCA, and added,
“With a bikini on!”
The man who I have mentioned, Mark, who is my coworker
who has my phone number and we have had some great and
revealing conversations with told me about his fears
about his mother in this inclement weather. Mark has
been noticeably absent recently and I was glad to hear
that his reason is that if ice or cold would somehow
effect the electricity at his rural located house, he
needs to be there to start the ‘back up generator.’
I was glad to hear that his mother and he were not sick
and wished him a good weekend, when I was leaving to
head to my Mom’s. I was pleased to have him worry about
my traveling back on Sunday, too.
If this is going to develop into a relationship, it is
looking like it will take awhile. It’s moving at a
snail’s pace. Or slower than molasses!
Back to the subject of men and their approaches to life.
I am wondering if you have ever thought I would be open
to beginning an affair or flirtatious email interactions
with a man in a committed relationship?
Do I give off these ‘vibes?’
I wondered about this and my closest girlfriend says, “No
way! You have blogged about your ex-husband and how you
don’t have a broken moral compass. Also, you have only
said, ‘hugs’ when writing notes online, and you would
never do this, Robin!”
I have had that man at the library (who now we all know
is married) and a man who asked for my email address who
complained about his relationship with his wife. I have
been on a fellow blogger’s site where I have spent a
few conversations pressing my opinion that it is good
to try new things with your partner. I have also recommended
counseling and the movie, “Hope Springs” is rather explicit
in handling a love life that has turned into a ‘desert.’
And I mean an arid desert not a delicious dessert!
Anyway, I was disheartened with this personal exchange from
someone who has responded on my blog, although you would
not remember him, since his is very infrequent in his
I guess I just wanted to ask this question, letting you
know (and possibly visitors here, too) that I would not
want to get involved with a man who is either in a
marriage or a committed relationship. I don’t judge you
or anyone else, if you do this… Just don’t ask me to!
I would go back to my Pierce Brosnan, look alike, ex-husband
and have an affair…if I didn’t have a conscience.
(He has been married for over 20 years but pitches a campaign
once a year for me to ‘fool around’ with him.)
I would not go with any strangers nor participate in said,
“dirty talk” that you find in chat rooms, as this fellow
blogger suggested I do.
My politeness and indirect approach may have not been
understandable to the reader.
My direct approach with this subject and controversy is
hopefully clear as glass that has been polished with a
cleaning product like Windex!
Lastly, on this subject, I have never quite known what
Meatloaf, the singer, meant in his song,
“I Would Do Anything For Love.”
In my case, “I would NOT do that!”
Thanks for ‘listening’ to me.
Happy Valentine’s Day tomorrow!